I was asked to publish the poem that I read at the Canadian Reformed Seminary’s  convocation on September 8.  I’ve posted it below.

“Congratulations!

Today is your day.

You’re off to Great Places!

Your off and away!

 

You have brains in your head

You have feet in your shoes.

You can steer yourself

Any direction proffs choose.

 

You’ve selected a way

To the senior’s room.

For 3 years you’ll stay

Till your brain starts to zoom.

 

And when things start to happen,

Don’t worry, don’t stew.

Just go right along.

You’ll start happening too.

 

Dr. Smith.

 

What’s this? It’s alephs and dalets,

Ugaritic towns and Aramaic sounds.

Who’s this? It’s Hebrew’s great valet,

Smith is in town, serving up rounds

 

Of yiqtols and tiqtols with hithpalels to spare.

 

Oh what wonderful acumen!

The wryest of jokesters!

Exegesis like bitumen.

Wit dry like a toaster.

 

Your heart is a patter, your feet are a pitter.

You’ve entered the ancient world of natty nazirites and nasty Nephilim.

John Smith is your leader, navigating letters

To archeology, geography: we can master these elephants.

 

Segue

 

But your adventures in Israel have not ended.

A new professor has this way wended.

His favourite word is delight (Doesn’t that rhyme with N.T Wright?).

Time to pull up your socks and let new worlds take flight.

 

Dr. Visscher

 

Verily, Visscher,  the president of our tour bus.

With vigour he will demonstrate that Wright is wrong not right,

That textus receptus should be textus rejectus.

He waxes and wanes, filled right to the brim

 

With Romans and with Paul; with Josephus and Cephas; he has it all.

 

Speaking with vigour

He joins class dispute

Showing his valour,

Wisdom of repute.

 

Get off your Facebook, your twitter, your Pinterest

Off to the realms of Sabbath rest in Hebrews and righteousness in Paul.

Ponder Roman coins, Pharisees peak your interest,

Seek new understanding of Jesus’ words, wisdom, and call.

 

Segue

 

But you want to reflect on these old truths a little longer.

Welcome to Domus Dogmaticus, each room is a world of its own.

Standing on sola sciptura our house becomes stronger.

The rooms strengthened by age-old wisdom, come dwell in these fortified bones.

 

Dr. Van Vliet

 

Brother Jason is our guide, mapping dogma far and wide

He is the daring doctor, diagnosing Schleiermacher’s bad liver

And Barth’s fractured breastbone; a constructor on the side

He shores up failing arches with adverbial attributes. If ever

 

You wonder about the extra Calvinisticum or the principium unicum, then ask this magistrum.

 

Cobwebs swept away.

Mysteries de-mystified.

Come for a day.

Your brain will be amplified.

 

They’ll say you are enlightened, now truly woke.

Now that you’ve wandered these halls of ancient oak.

Berkhof, Bavinck, Velema, your new guides soak

You in knowledge, which new mysteries provokes.

 

Segue

 

Your head is swirling with all the knowledge you’ve learned.

Your heart is swelling because of the status you’ve earned.

You’re a bit premature; another proff has turned

To take his way down; No, class is not yet adjourned.

 

Dr. Van Raalte

 

Its time to go deep into story of the church.

It’s ethics, It’s polity, flagrant heretics and deep schisms

Van Raalte discourses on these from his perch

Dividing and distinguishing all the historical isms.

 

Halacious historians who hystericize about scholasticism are his specialty for

 

Terrible Ted will not brook

These illogical conclusions

From ill-educated books

So deeply steeped in delusions.

 

You’ve wandered into these halls; now sit in thrall

As canonical law and men of Geneva wildly dance

In the history of this terrestrial ball.

Now you’re part of that history; its time to find your dance stance.

 

Segue

 

But before you’ve joined the music of the spheres

And your course in the journey of life is plotted,

Sit down once again; another proff steers

Into this room. Now praxis will be unknotted.

 

Dr. de Visser.

 

From a country far off and truly exotic

De Visser comes bringing the elixir of wisdom

To counsel and preaching.  His teaching hypnotic

Gives insight for mission and bright vision for kingdom.

 

Homiletics, Poimenics, Catechetics, from rhetorical strategies to careful aesthetics,

 

This doctor quietly discerns

Each question that burns

In the reason of each student

For answers prudent.

 

Concerns about pastoral care and the high affairs

Of the church. His teaching has the ready anecdote

To illustrate the foolish choice and the hidden flair

Of discernment; learning to reach the right antidote.

 

Finale

 

Now you’ve sat in this high hall of learning for three years.

You’ve tasted the white honey mead of knowledge

And learned the steps of wisdom before your call appears.

It’s time to leave that room, yes leave your college.

 

Finis